Clarification needed

I think I need to start clarifying myself. I have always been someone who will say, "If you need anything, please feel free to call me".

There are two kinds of people I am talking to there; those where I mean,

"If you need anything, please feel free to call me".

And

those where I mean, "If you have been taken hostage and get away to make one phone call, please feel free to call me - because I will do everything I can to save you at that point only. So if it's not the zombie apocalypse taking you by storm, please don't call".

Yes, I think that clarification would much more adequately categorize the two groups of people I promise to help upon phoned request. Might help finish some of the silly parts of my life. :)

Happy Monday.